Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t buy bullshit

Mariners fall flat again: 'We'll keep fighting' - The Seattle Times

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

How do you feel about the impending end of what Donald Trump calls "the Green New scam"?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Is it normal to hate my dog, but feel too guilty to get rid of him?

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

What if the Big Bang wasn’t the beginning? Our research suggests it may have taken place inside a black hole - The Conversation

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Why cant I breathe when I sleep on my back, I can breathe if im on my side or stomach but I feel uncomfortable since either my neck is twisted or my back is in pain, im physically healthy and my surroundings are clean so whats the problem?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for fakery

How can someone determine if their partner is in another romantic relationship, particularly if they do not live together?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I can read

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

If James Bond is meant to be the best secret agent in the world, how come all the bad guys in the World seem to know who he is?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I actually pay taxes

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

How can one justify in Sweden that total subsidies for public green energy initiatives being approximately 8.2 billion SEK per year? Electric cars at market price typically cost an average of 500,000 SEK which is above household budgets.

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I have complete contempt for traitorism

40 Father’s Day Gifts He’ll Wanna Brag About - BuzzFeed

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I see through liars

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

The Weekender: LSU Shreveport Baseball Has Perfect 59-0 Season, Cornell Wins Men's Lacrosse National Champions - Eleven Warriors

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Have you been arrested or investigated?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I can count

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I understand how hurricane paths work

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”